Warts and all...

Having been on FB and other social networking sites, it is not hard to find somebody griping about something...their bf, gf, bff, politics, school, boss, or somebody else altogether.  It is the what we do not see that I am writing about today.  You see, every person you know has issues that they do not share with anyone, even you.  It is easy to forget that.  You might not know that person X has a spot on their lung that they are concerned about, or that person Y is going through a custody battle, or that person C is a caregiver for an ailing parent.  Not everyone shares all of their issues with the world, even in this day and age of instant communication.  We have become accustomed to sharing nearly every aspect of our lives with the masses, while secretly fighting our own personal battles.  Sometimes we get snarky to a friend or make an off-hand comment that can be the catalyst for an unintentional emotional rift to develop.  That funny little comment can be the straw that broke the camel's back, or in this case, the emotional tilting point.  I have some very close friends--many of whom I have known for decades.  I have also had the misfortune of both being the aggressor and the target of the aggression caused by invisible trauma that only the involved persons know about.  Today I had the misfortune of correcting a friend's grammar in a post--something I have done a million times before without consequence--and because I did not know that they were having a crisis day, I really upset that person.  This could have turned into a battle of the bitches, but thankfully it did not because after chatting a bit, I discovered what the problem was and felt like an ass, but was soon forgiven because that friend also realized that I did not know about it and that it was an innocent comment.  Our friendship will endure past this and all will be well (I hope) on the other end...

I did not write this to point at any specific person, nor to recommend walking on eggshells around everyone.  I wrote this to point out that we all have our demons and that sometimes, our demons like to get in the middle of things.  If we recognize that every snarky comment or harsh response is not a personal attack, then friendships will become stronger and that same thing that could almost destroy a beautiful friendship will help to keep it from breaking in the future.  Scarred flesh and bone is always stronger than undamaged.  I love all of my friends...and know they love me...warts and all.